In my own defense, I am funny

The class clown, the funny guy at work, or the friend who's always cracking up the people in your group of friends, what do they have in common? Almost all of them are using the comedy as a way to defend themselves. So many people were shocked by Robin Williams depression and heartbreaking choice to end his own life, but most of the "class clowns" out there already knew that funny people are rarely as happy as their humor may indicate.
Here's one simple tidbit that you might find interesting, if you get to know me and one day I seem depressed or moody, it's not because I'm having a bad day, it because I finally trust you enough to tell you how I'm really feeling. It's because you've made it past the front I put up for people I don't trust, so I can keep them at a safe distance. It's likely that it was simply the first time that I was comfortable enough around you to drop the act.
I'm not proud that my humor can also be my defense mechanism but it is a part of my personality. True, it gets you some immediate popularity in situations where you're uncomfortable around new people, but it's also an easy way to keep people at a safe distance. When I enter a conversation and someone says something hurtful, my response is a self effacing humorous retort. Broke my heart? Sounds like its time to throw out a one liner.
I know I would love to tell you that I'm a bad ass who can bite a piece of metal and spit out nails. Chuck Norris? Never heard of her. But I'm not that tough, I take criticism to heart and a joke can be an effective way to disarm someone that I see as a threat. I genuninely care about what people think of me and want to be liked, even though I know that realistically, I can't get along with everyone and will not be liked by everyone.
It may hurt some of my friends to know that I'm keeping them at a safe distance, but in my own defense I am funny, and as my own defense I am funny.